When Pain is Prolonged

 I had forgotten all about this sermon I found and wanted to share it here since it's on Job:

When Pain is Prolonged
Selections from Job
Job 2:11-3:4

One of the most difficult times in my life was the five years my family endured as a result of an un-diagnosed illness my mother had. For five years my mother was sick and no doctor could figure out what was really wrong. In that time she endured several surgeries including having her gall bladder removed, a hysterectomy and many other exploratory surgeries. And each time the doctor would come out and tell my dad, “Sir, we found nothing. But still my mom continued to weaken and worsen.

Looking back, the hardest part of the ordeal was not the initial shock that something was deeply wrong and that my mothers life was at stake. It was seeing my mom battle lingering, prolonged pain. Every day she was in just complete agony with no end or solution in sight. She couldn't eat and she was losing weight. There were days when I thought, it might be more comforting for her if she were dead. There were days when my mother probably wanted to die too! Watching someone you love go through prolonged pain is hard. I. JOBS PROLONGED AGONY
Last week we began looking at the life of man in the Old Testament named Job. Job began the day as a millionaire but in a series of unfortunate circumstances he would lose all his wealth.

If that wasn't enough, a tornado hit the house where his ten children were and they all died.

Then the Bible tells us that Jobs health broke. Chuck Swindoll gives a summary of Jobs physical pain. He suffered:

Inflamed ulcerous sores (Job 2:7)
Persistent itching (Job 2:8)
Facial disfiguration (Job 2:12)
Loss of appetite ([Job 3:24)
Fears and depression (Job 3:25)
Sores that burst open, scab over, crack and ooze with pus (Job 7:5)
Worms that form in the sores themselves (Job 7:5)
Difficulty in breathing (Job 9:18)
A darkening of the eyelid (Job 16:16)
Loss of weight (Job 19:20)
Continual pain (Job 30:27)
High fever with chills and diarrhea (Job 30:30)

On top of that Job says, ““my breath is offensive to my wife (Job 19:17).

Job was so disfigured and disgusting that nearly everyone including his servants rejected him. He was so poor and despised that eventually he had to go live in the city garbage dump.

Warren Wiersbe describes what living there was like. In this place the city garbage was deposited and burned and the citys rejects lived, begging money from whomever passed by. Dogs fought over something to eat and citys dung was brought and burned. Job, who was once the greatest of all men in the East was now living in abject poverty and shame.

Jobs suffering was tremendous. But worse than that, there seemed to be no end in sight to his pain and things weren't getting better. You know, the most severe test of life is not the immediate crises but the prolonged pain that follows. That is why it is important that we learn to hold on to our faith when we are in what Jill Briscoe calls, Gods waiting room. Where we are waiting for answers or some relief but it just doesn't come.

I think we can learn three valuable lessons from Job about how to maintain our faith when we go through prolonged pain. James 5:11 says, You have heard of Jobs perseverance and have seen what the Lord finally brought about. There are three lessons that Job teaches us about enduring through prolonged pain. II. OUR FRIENDS MAY NOT UNDERSTAND
One thing Job teaches us is that when we go through prolonged pain OUR FRIENDS MAY NOT UNDERSTAND. Job chapter 2 tells us that three of Jobs closest friends came to visit him.

Job 2:11 When Job’s three friends, Eliphaz the Temanite, Bildad the Shuhite and Zophar the Naamathite, heard about all the troubles that had come upon him, they set out from their homes and met together by agreement to go and sympathize with him and comfort him.

Good friends care enough to come without being asked to come. No one sent a message to these guys, they just came. Friends don't need an invitation; spontaneously they come.

Job 2:12 When they saw him from a distance, they could hardly recognize him; they began to weep aloud, and they tore their robes and sprinkled dust on their heads.

Good friends aren't turned off by distasteful sights. Friends don't turn away because the one they love has been reduced to the shell of his former self. These men literally raised their voices and sobbed as they sat down on the ground with Job and said nothing for seven days.

Len Sweet in his book Postmodern Pilgrims recounts a letter a physician wrote to him:

Today I visited an eight-year-old girl dying of cancer. Her body was disfigured by her disease and its treatment. She was in almost constant pain. As I entered her room, I was overcome immediately by her suffering so unjust, unfair, unreasonable. Even more overpowering was the presence of her grandmother lying in bed beside her with her huge body embracing this precious, inhuman suffering.

I stood in awe, for I knew I was on holy ground. the suffering of innocent children is horrifying beyond words. I will never forget the great, gentle arms and body of this grandmother. She never spoke while I was there. She was holding and participating in suffering that she could not relieve, and somehow her silent presence was relieving it. No words could express the magnitude of her love.

Jobs friends came and stayed for a week, just providing companionship and sharing in his agony. Their presence probably gave Job the freedom to express his emotions.

Job 3:1-4 After this, Job opened his mouth and cursed the day of his birth. He said: “May the day of my birth perish, and the night it was said, ‘A boy is born!’ That day—may it turn to darkness; may God above not care about it; may no light shine upon it.

Job was discovering the reality of prolonged pain. He wishes he'd never been born. If you read all of chapter 3 you'll see that it is dedicated to Jobs mournful wail. Chuck Swindoll calls it Job, in raw reality. Reality is sinking in. Sometimes there are experiences that even the hurting cant seem to find hope.

After listening to Jobs sniveling for seven days, his friends had had enough. They decided to speak up and straighten him out. So one of the three amigos: Eliphaz speaks to Job:

Job 4:2-8 “If someone ventures a word with you, will you be impatient? But who can keep from speaking? Think how you have instructed many, how you have strengthened feeble hands. Your words have supported those who stumbled; you have strengthened faltering knees. But now trouble comes to you, and you are discouraged; it strikes you, and you are dismayed. Should not your piety be your confidence and your blameless ways your hope? “Consider now: Who, being innocent, has ever perished? Where were the upright ever destroyed? As I have observed, those who plow evil and those who sow trouble reap it.


Do you detect a little condemnation in Eliphaz's words? If he came to sympathize and comfort, this is a bizarre way to do it. What Job needed is grace and acceptance, not judgment. He's basically saying to Job, It's my observation that people who suffer on this level have got sin in their life. Job, God must be disciplining you. When someone is suffering, theological insights don't help too much. Eliphaz should've kept his mouth shut. I mean no words, no matter how profound or how true can heal a wound as deep as Jobs.

Joe Bayly lost three children in a series of tragedies. In his book, The Last Thing We Talk About, he relates that one friend visited him in the funeral home and talked and talked about God's grace and how God would get him through it. He knew all those things were true, but he couldn't wait for his friend to leave. Another friend came and just sat with him quietly, not saying much, not trying to explain. He was just there if needed him. Bayly said, I hated to see him go.

Don't you hate it when you are suffering and people get all preachy or philosophical on you and say things like, You're still young; you'll have other children. Or God works all things out for your good. You just want to smack them.

The truth is that you can't expect more out of people than they're able to deliver. Most of the time your friends want to help but they just don't know how or they say things that actually hurt more than they help. Galatians 6:2 says, Carry each others burdens, but a few verses later it says to carry your own load.

There is a sense in which other people can help. There is another sense in which you have to bear that burden alone with nothing other than the help of God. It's one thing for your friends to minister to you, but they get tired. You can wear them out. Don't expect more of them than they are capable of delivering. R.E.M. sings, Everybody hurts, take comfort in your friends. There is a limit to that.

Job got a limited amount of comfort from his friends and that was all. III. GOD APPEARS TO BE DISTANT
Another thing Job teaches us is that when we go through prolonged pain GOD OFTEN APPEARS TO BE DISTANT. Job was faithful to God through his trial but he does question whether God had disappeared. Or whether God even cared. Listen to his questions about Gods whereabouts:

Job 13:24, Why have you turned your back and count me your enemy?

Job 19:7 “Though I cry, ‘I’ve been wronged!’ I get no response; though I call for help, there is no justice.

Job 23:3-4 If only I knew where to find him; if only I could go to his dwelling! I would state my case before him and fill my mouth with arguments.

Job 23:8-10 “But if I go to the east, he is not there; if I go to the west, I do not find him. When he is at work in the north, I do not see him; when he turns to the south, I catch no glimpse of him. But he knows the way that I take; when he has tested me, I will come forth as gold.

Job 30:20 “I cry out to you, O God, but you do not answer; I stand up, but you merely look at me.

One of the most difficult tests of faith is to wait for God when answers don't come. Dr. John Claypool was a pastor at the Crescent Hill Baptist Church in Louisville, Kentucky. His little daughter contracted leukemia. When she was weakening and wasting away in intense pain she asked, Daddy, when will this leukemia go away? He said, I don't know, darling, but we're doing everything in our power to find an answer to cure it. There was a long silence and then she asked, Have you asked God when the leukemia will go away? Her Father hedged a bit and said, You know, darling, we have prayed again and again for God to help us. Then she asked, What did God say? And he had no answer.

Claypool asked, What do say to a little girl at a time when the heavens seem utterly silent?
Have you ever had one of those times in your life where you felt as if God didn't care? It's frustrating. A Jewish holocaust victim who had suffered greatly at the hands of the Nazis prayed, God if this is the way you treat your friends, its no wonder you don't have very many.

The Psalmist prayed in the Bible, Psalm 44:23-24 Awake, O Lord! Why do you sleep? Rouse yourself! Do not reject us forever. Why do you hide your face and forget our misery and oppression?
A. HOW TO DEAL WITH HIS SILENCE...
Verla Gillmor from Christianity Today supplies some really good advice to help us handle these times in our lives when God seems distant.

1. She says first remember that GOD'S SILENCE IS NOT THE SAME AS GOD'S ABSENCE. The fact that God seems distant probably has nothing to do with God and nothing to do with your sins, but everything to do with your feelings. This is when you have to trust the promises of scripture that God is always present even when it feels totally the opposite.

Bob Russell talks about a Native American rite of passage when their boys turned 12. They would blindfold them and lead them deep into the woods and sit them by a tree. If the boy would sit there alone all night without removing the blindfold, he was considered a man. But he would have to just sit there, aware that there were predators and enemies lurking nearby. That would be hard to do with all the rustling of the leaves and the threatening noises of the woods at night.

But in the morning when he removed his blindfold he would be surprised to see his father, just a few feet away, poised with his weapon to protect him. He'd been there, quietly waiting, protecting all night, and the boy wasn't aware of it.

Deuteronomy 31:8 says The Lord himself goes before you and will be with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged.”

Ray Edmonds said, Don't doubt in the dark what God has told you in the light. 2. Secondly, Vilmor says GOD'S SILENCE DEEPENS OUR FAITH. Harold Wilke was born with no arms and one time when he was a preschooler he was struggling to get his shirt over his head and shoulders. He said, I was grunting and sweating and my mother just stood there and watched. A relative turned to his mother and said, Ida, why don't you help the child? His mother responded through gritted teeth, I am helping him.

Sometimes God stands by in silence and does nothing because it actually helps us grow. Job dug in and said, Even though God slay me, yet will I trust Him. (Job 13:15). Job said, I don't know what God is doing here, but I am going to trust that this is making me a better person.

IV. WATCH OUT FOR BITTERNESS
One last thing Job teaches about going through prolonged pain is TO WATCH OUT FOR BITTERNESS AND DEPRESSION. Job battled bitterness towards life and God. He battled depression. He said, As surely as God lives, who has denied me justice, the Almighty, who has made me taste the bitterness of soul. (Job 27:2).

When Job's pain was prolonged, he battled bitterness toward God, resentment toward his friends, despair toward life, even thoughts of suicide. When you're really down, Satan will plant thoughts of self-destruction in your mind and try to convince you that you'd would be better off if you end it all.

But if you are bitter with God, let him know about it. Trust me, God can take whatever you've got to say to him. A preacher who had a son killed in an auto accident says that when he learned what had happened, he got into his car and drove off screaming in anger at God. He even cursed God. Then he pulled over to the side of the road, buried his head in the steering wheel and sobbed and pleaded with God for forgiveness. He said, God didn't strike me dead, although I deserved it. God didn't put a curse on me although He could have. When the explosion was over God was still there, loving him, comforting him, forgiving him.

C.S. Lewis once said, We must lay before God what is in us, not what is not in us. If you are upset with God, don't fake it. IT IS NOT ILLEGAL TO EXPRESS YOUR HONEST EMOTIONS AND FEELINGS TO GOD.

King David did this in Psalm 13. How long, O LORD? Will you forget me forever? How long will you hide your face from me? How long will my enemy triumph over me? Look on me and answer, O LORD my God. Give light to my eyes, or I will sleep in death. (Psalm 13:1-3).

In times of prolonged pain, I think it helps us to remember that GOD HAS PROMISED A REWARD TO THOSE WHO ENDURE SUFFERING.

Hebrews 10:32 reads, Remember those earlier days after you had received the light, when you stood your ground in a great contest in the face of suffering because you knew that you yourselves had better and lasting possessions. So do not throw away your confidence; it will be richly rewarded. You need to persevere so that when you have done the will of God, you will receive what he has promised.

God has never promised that the pain will end in this life. Your pain could exist till day you depart this world. But God has promised us eternal life and a guaranteed end to this misery. So would you gain an eternal perspective. What Chuck Swindoll calls a vertical perspective on life. This is what Job did. He said, I know that my Redeemer lives, and that in the end he will stand upon the earth (Job 19:25).

For those who have suffered a great deal yet remained faithful, there is a promise that one Jesus Christ will return to this earth and wipe away every tear.

Dr. John Claypool's daughter asked, What did God say? And God was silent. She died of leukemia on Easter Sunday morning. The next Sunday that he preached Dr. Claypool quoted Isaiah. 40:31, But those who hope in the LORD will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint.

In essence he said, Sometimes we mount up with wings as an eagle and fly. We're on top of the world. Sometimes we run and don't grow weary. God sustains us daily. Sometimes it's all we can do and not faint. I'd like to say that since my daughter is in heaven, I'm mounting up with eagles and flying. But the truth is I'm struggling to walk and not faint. But I still believe that one day God will make all things right.

John Claypool believed what Job believed. That no matter what the outcome, God was in control and his promises are true.

http://www.sermoncentral.com/sermon.asp?SermonID=80723&page=3