My local newspaper interviewed me about what it's like to live with pain. This article came out on August 6th, 2008: It was a huge feature article taking up one whole page! I thought they did a really good job altogether. The editor did make a few
mistakes, but we'll have to live with them lol So without further ado,
here it is!
Here's the first mistake: next to the photo above it says:
"Cindy sits at her computer, reading posts in http://www.fresh-hope.com,
the private pain forum she started online. The forum allows people with
chronic pain to speak with others about what they are all going
through."
Obviously FH is not just for people who live with pain, only one of the forums is for that.
The Challenge Of Living With Chronic Pain
New Ipswich woman says internet has become a lifeline for those who are suffering
By Sam Bonacci
Monadnock Ledger-Transcript Staff
Cindy has been living with chronic back pain for 8 years. The 52
year old New Ipswich resident found herself with the never ending pain
after an on the job injury damaged disks in her back. Cindy has gone
through more medicines than she can recall, numerous surgeries, and much
physical therapy. But nothing has taken away the pain.
"It never occurred to me that I wouldn't be fixed", she says.
Cindy has fought for years to find a way to get rid of the pain, until it was made clear by a doctor that this was her new life.
"I'll never forget him saying, "you're done, you'll never work again
the rest of your life" The words literally rang in my head and I didn't
hear anything else he said."
Cindy has learned to live with the pain that has changed her life.
Unable to work, a good day has become one with less pain, not none. The
act of getting up in the morning and getting dressed takes
determination.
"A good day is one where I only have to use my morphine a few times," says Cindy.
Chronic pain can be very difficult to understand. It differs greatly
from the acute pain of an injury such as a broken bone, and can linger
for years, even for the rest of a person's life. It's called chronic
pain for a reason," says Dr PK Suchdev, the president of Pain Solutions,
a practice that deals specifically with treating pain and has an office
at the Monadnock Community Hospital. We look at it in many ways like
you would look at diabetes and blood pressure...we can control it, but
sometimes eliminating it may be an unrealistic expectation."
Chronic pain is defined as any pain lasting more than 3 months.
Chronic pain will be experienced by 50% of Americans in the lifetime, he
said. People that suffer from chronic pain should not feel they are
alone", says Suchdev.
Cindy's pain starts even before she wakes up in the morning. Getting out of bed can be a trying experience that takes her hours.
(another mistake--it doesn't actually take hours lol it just seems like it!)
She cannot work and is limited in the amount of time she can spend
away from her home. Everything she does in a day is a matter of gauging
how much pain it will cause, and how that will affect the rest of her
day and the next. Being at home with chronic pain is nothing like when a
healthy person stays home when they are sick.
"My life revolves around pain," says Cindy, adding that just getting
dressed is a chore. "The rest of my day is planned around my pain".
It is not just her daily life that the pain affects. Cindy has never
been healthy enough to play with any of her grandchildren. They have
always had to grow up being told to be careful around her.
(note by me: another
mistake: that's not true. I DO play with them, but it's quiet play not
running or jumping, somersaults, or rough housing or anything active at
all.)
Chronic pain can be caused by a number of things, says Suchdev. It
varies from instances where the body is giving misinformation such as
phantom limbs in amputees, or where a physical injury such as multiple
back injuries, scars, or surgeries, continues to cause pain. Chronic
pain can also be related to injuries severe enough that they are not
treatable", says Suchdev.
Cindy has gone through a number of treatments, but none of them fully
relieved the pain. Even the narcotics she is on now merely dull the
pain.
"They relieve the pain to the point where you can deal with it", she
says. There are numerous ways that chronic pain can be treated, says
Suchdev. Painkillers can be injected. Surgery can be done to burn the
lesion specific nerves that provide the pain. Doctors can also implant
various devices that can be used to inject relief into the source of the
pain. The simplest example would be to place a steroid medication into
areas of the spine to reduce swelling," says Suchdev. "Pain is very
complex and that is why it has to be treated in a very complex and
multidisciplinary manner."
Pain does not only affect the body, but also the mind, he says. There
can be problems with family and friends, and there are instances of
depression in chronic pain patients.
caption under second photo reads:
Cindy sits in her kitchen in the house in which she spends most of
her days. Although she has put on a smile, she says people living with
pain must make a conscious decision to continue smiling and not be
gloomy all the time.
Cindy said that although it can be difficult to be happy, it is
necessary. "People expect us to be gloomy", she says. "you can afford to
be gloomy and down in the dumps for a week , and let people know you
don't feel good. But when you are like this for years, that's a choice
you have to make. You have to choose what kind of face you are going to
put on it. Those of us who learn to live with it, successfully anyway,
choose to smile and it actually helps us too, because you feel better
when you smile".
The pain and the new lifestyle can create a rift between people with
chronic pain and those they used to spend time with. Eventually, people
start to come around less often and friends lose touch, says Cindy. "I
don't blame them because they're busy just like I used to be," she says.
There's also a stigma that comes along with chronic pain, she says.
Some people think that people with pain are drug addicts or may be
faking it. People with chronic pain often do not look sick, Cindy says.
Someone she knows has even been accosted for using a handicapped parking
permits, while others have heard comments while they walk by holding
their cane. They may not need it when they walk into a store, said
Cindy, but after walking around they will be hurting and relying heavily
upon the cane as they come out.
"We want understanding, not pity," says Cindy. "We try not to let it show. We don't want to be different".
Cindy has found solace in an online forum she started at http://www.fresh-hope.com.
Through this private forum, she and other people suffering through pain
can speak openly about their lives. Cindy says many forum members
reveal sides of their life that they may not show even their closest
loved ones.
"The internet has become a lifeline for lots of us because we are
stuck at home, " she says. "The people on fresh-hope are like family to
me".
Chronic pain is not just a concern of the patients and their families
and friends. The cost of treating chronic pain, says Suchdev is more
then the cost of treating AIDS, cancer and heart disease combined. "It's
an incredibly expensive and large epidemic in the country, so there's a
lot of research being devoted to the treatment of chronic pain,"he
says. "Ten or 15 years ago I could have only imagined some of the
treatments we have now." The latest research is exploring the connection
with phantom limb syndrome.
But Cindy has stopped looking for the next new treatment, although
she continues trying different medications and will be returning to
physical therapy. She will continue dealing with her pain as she has for
the last 8 years, through the support of her family and friends both
online and in person. She will carry on with her routine, taking the bad
and continuing to live for the good.
"Finally your body will give you a break, only if it's just for an
hour. You learn to kind of live for that hour's relief" says Cindy. It's
strange. It's a very different way of life.
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